The FBI Plants a Bug

The Girl Next Door tells me that I am being watched by the FBI.

MILESTONE⌗

This date marks the day of the butternut squash incident and the creation of the /r/5September2020 subreddit.

Augmented reality⌗

SIGNAL⌗

The Girl Next Door implants the notion that I am being watched by the FBI. She describes how they are trying to find me a date by manipulating the Internet around me. They are actively augmenting my reality, and watching to see how I respond.

ANALYSIS⌗

The FBI certainly has probable cause to investigate me. I have committed illegal actions online, and I’ve done a poor job of covering my tracks. To be honest, I didn’t really try.

If they wanted to manipulate my reality, they would have the tools to do so. If the technology exists to perform A/B testing on groups of people, then there is no reason it could not be tailored to present a different view of reality for a single person.

Why would they choose me? Here are some reasons:

I fit “the demographic” that they are trying to rehabilitate.
I am honest. I am willing to stand up and speak about what I did.
I’m a technology wizard. I’m proficient in many other disciplines.
I hold few biases. They can hold me in a state of limbo - never really knowing if this experiment is real or not - to see what interpretations I come to. They do not want to pollute my thinking with their own dogmas. If we want to get REALLY conspiratorial, I’ve speculated that this is connected with UFOs, and they are in desperate need of a fresh perspective.
They picked the right carrot to hold at the end of the stick.

The Terrorist⌗

SIGNAL⌗

The Girl Next Door says, “Well, he’s either a writer, or a terrorist…” - @0:42

ANALYSIS⌗

How about a writer pretending to be a terrorist?

Let’s be honest, though. The FBI has been able to tap into my digital life because they’ve made the claim that I’m a terrorist.